too busy, didn't call back, didn't seem to care

I have the urge to have a winge and vent. Normally, I just go about my business, solving my issues as they arise. I have a good network of close friends who I can turn to for advise and help if needed, but sometimes, even our never ending bag of magic tricks comes up empty.

This has been one of those times.

My Autistic son Zak has in recent months started to bang his head and wrists, bite himself and cause himself harm when he is distressed, having a tantie, is frustrated and frightened.

Initially, I physically restrained him from doing it and talked to him about hurting himself. But, over a period of time it worsened. A lovely lady came to school to assess him for different sensory programs, routine structures etc and recomended that we just ignore the behaviour because, basically he wont do himself any harm. Although I had reservations, I thought ok then... I suppose he is not going to hurt himself too badly after all because you would assume that he would stop if the pain was too bad.

In theory, its a grand idea. Sounds logical, reasonable and I thought ok. We will have a go at that. Until he came home from school with a big egg on his head from bashing it against the wooden decking. He gave himself concussion. A couple of days later I got a call from school to tell me he wasnt well, they thought he had a sore mouth or tooth, something in that general area. As he is quite non-verbal it is often a guessing game as to what is going on with him.

After I bought him home, he was definately unhappy and in pain. I looked at his teeth and felt them all and none were loose or appeared to be broken. There was one molar on the bottom that had a sharp edge though. I rang a dentist to get him seen to straight away. Best they could do would be 3 hours away. While trying to confort him Pam (my friend) and I rubbed his back and tried hugging him etc.

He was crying and griding his teeth and rocking. Within 30 minutes he had ripped the whole molar out of his mouth!!! I rang the dentist back and told them of the latest news and I still had to take him in to get an x-ray on his mouth in case he left something behind.

It was so hard to believe that he could pull a molar out of his mouth from not loose to completely ripped out in such a short amout of time. Imagine the pain!!! That must have hurt. Within a week he had pulled out another one on the other side. The dentist said they shouldnt come out for at least another year.

I contacted Dept. Human Services on 5th June 2008 and spoke to the disability intake worker to get some advice. Not only about the self harming, but his pain tolerance levels. They did an urgent refferal to B.I.S.T (Behavioural Intervention Services Team). Apparently this should only take a few days before someone contacts me and comes out to see what we can do. I knew this was a bit above my head. After ringing back a few more times and met with the same silence and no return calls, I became a little disheartened. I have always managed to just go with the flow and the first time I ask for some help from someone..... too busy, didnt call back, didnt seem to care.

Finally on 10th JULY someone from BIST rang me. Only to tell me sorry, we have been busy and are understaffed and someone will be out to see you or contact you in a couple of weeks. The worker from Dept. Human Services rang back and asked if all was going well now. She was not very impressed when I told her that they have only rang to let me know they were busy and had not forgotten my URGENT refferal. She called me back yesterday 29th JULY and asked how it all went, and I had the same answer for her..... too busy, didnt call back, didnt seem to care. She was great and put in a formal complaint to the client services manager..... still didnt get me the help I needed even though she did all the right things.

Suprisingly the BIST fellow called me a couple of hours after she had phoned. You won't believe it........ they have been terribly busy, understaffed and had not forgotten about us!!! (thats not how it feels) and someone will ring me today and we can work on the problem. Yep you guessed it......... too busy, didnt call back, didnt seem to care.

I think next time I want to ask for help I will definately try to solve it on my own with the help of friends and not reply on the experts..... too busy, didnt call back, didnt seem to care.....

Ok I have vented and winged enough......

Tomorrow is going to be a GREAT day